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Pacific Northwest, United States
I am The Shytrovert a proud, moderately shy INFP and this is my blog. I write about society, relationships, current events and how shy and introverted folks can cope in an extroverted world.

4/21/10

Tough Love for the Shy

In my abject desperation to overcome my poor social skills I have read many books over the years, and I can tell you this, none has opened my eyes more or helped me more in the last few weeks than the e-book The Popular Club. It’s like the Skinny Bitch of social anxiety books. I highly recommend it for those looking to improve their schmooze-factor. A caveat: the language is pretty abusive. You will be called a loser, told that being an extrovert is unequivocally better than being an introvert, that being fat will screw you socially in a big way, and that you will need to conform, period. On the upside, it gives you a valuable glimpse into the world of extroverts to confirm what you've always suspected – their banter is often quite vapid, the content of what is said is frequently irrelevant, and all that matters is talking, so stop thinking about what you’re going to say ('cause only losers do that).


The Real World Test

After devouring The Popular Club e-book as if it was my last supper, I went out with my significant other's friends and just started talking, secure in the knowledge that as long as I was, nobody would zero in on me for being too quiet, and that what I said, even if it was stupid, would be quickly forgotten. For perhaps the first time in my life, a social encounter went exactly as I wanted it to. The suggestions in the e-book actually worked, people. And no, non-stop gibber jabber is not necessary, but contribution certainly is. All you need do to be in the game is to augh audibly along with the group, throw in a few yeahs, I think so toos or any commentary, smile a lot, and you’re good. People will actually LIKE YOU JUST BECAUSE YOU ARE CONTRIBUTING TO THE CONVERSATION. Holy cow! Where was this dude when I was in high school? So, The Popular Club – essential reading for Shytroverts.

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