Snackage

Sweet, crunchy, salty and healthy. The perfect snack.

Snacking is as American as a ballpark hotdog and a freshly baked apple pie. Supposedly it’s also why so many of us, me included, are chunkier than they should be.  Currently, I’m on the Weight Watchers plan, which is awesome.  I can’t follow anything else because I’m a rule breakin’ rebel.  As in rules, especially diet rules are effing B-O-R-I-N-G.  If you want to eat nothing but cheese and meat for two weeks or slam chalking chocolate shakes down your gullet, you go on with your bad self.  I prefer to eat fully from life’s bountiful table.

I have tried Atkins and Slim Fast too, and I was thinking a medical fast until I had to go into surgery one time and couldn’t eat anything for 24 hrs.  OMG.  That was fun .  I don’t know how those models and actresses do it…oh yeah, the make MILLIONS.  I guess I would go without food frequently for some serious cash.  Of course, I would turn into Naomi Campbell and be beatin’ people over the head with my cell phone and whatever else I could find until they fed me some real food.

Where's the REAL food, you wankers?  

But I digress.  I wanted to write about snacking and how essential it is for me, anyway.  I need to eat about every 4 hours like most humans.  When that isn’t possible a snack is essential.  In the slow and lonely working hours between after lunch and going home, usually around 3 or 4, I need some sustenance to carry me until dinner.  It’s real easy to reach for crap in the vending machine or at the receptionist desk if you work in an office.  But that is not helping me on my goal to be 5’4” and 120 lbs again.

What I have discovered is some really tasty, filling low point/low calorie snacks that are pretty nutritious. Fruit – usually for me at work is a banana, berries or an apple or pear- are fantastic because they are ZERO points on Weight Watchers.  So are most veggies like baby carrots.  Anyway, here are some of my favorite go to noms:

Low calorie snacks, tested and enjoyed

Fruit + 1 Tbsp peanut butter

Fruit + Baby Bel cheese wheel

Fruit + ½ oz nuts

Fruit leather, no sugar added

Dry fruit, no sugar added

Greek yogurt + fruit

Greek yogurt + 1 Tbsp low fat granola

Sugar Free, tall starbucks  latte

16 oz. regular coffee with sugar free creamer

Goldfish, ½ oz or (25 fishes)

1 cup Baby carrots, 1 Tbsp fat-free dressing

1 cup Baby carrots, 2 Tbsp. hummus

½ oz pita chips (5 chips), 2 Tbsp. hummus

2 squares dark chocolate

Fat Free jello chocolate pudding cup

Fat Free jello cup

Reduced fat nilla wafers

Assortment of olives (6 – 10 olives)

Beef jerky, small pack

What do you like for snackage?  Do you want some help with healthier options?  Do you need to let up on your snackage?  Some people just snack for no good reason or any good reason.  Up at night?   How about some popcorn.  Bored?  How about a candy bar.  At the movies, well you gotta hit the Mike and Ikes!  Me, I struggle with emotional eating as in God, the people at work make me want to commit murder I need a Big Mac and Fries, super size me. Don't forget my apple pie. 

I’m a work in progress. 

What's your deal?  Snack much?  Let me know.

Blacks & the Oscar Statue

  

Octavia Spencer wins best supporting actress for the Help

As a waited with baited breath during the Oscars last night, it suddenly struck me: how come when black people win an Oscar it is for ignoble or negative character portrayals? Not that I thought Octavia’s Oscar was for a ignoble character per say, but some people  think playing a maid is beneath black women now, especially since it’s been 50-some years since that was often the only role they could get in Hollywood. 

Still, it’s undeniable the Oscars blacks folks have won have been for pretty nasty characters.  Halle Berry was screwing the guy who killed her husband in Monsters Ball and was basically a ho who showed her boobs.  Denzel played a dirty cop in Training Day.  It’s almost like the Academy is saying oh, so and so deserves points for showing us the “authentic” face of blackness, which is base and undignified. 

It’s also interesting to note that when blacks win Oscars – or get nominated for Oscars -they are never for starring roles, but co-starring roles.  Viola Davis was not the star of The Help, Emma Stone was; Denzel was not the star of Training Day, Ethan Hawke was; Halle Berry was not the star of Monster’s Ball, Billy Bob Thornton was.  Hmn.

Viola Davis recently spoke with Tavis Smiley about blacks in Hollywood.  To paraphrase, she said that life is messy and that blacks, like everyone else are messy. She feels should be portrayed in all our humanity and sometimes that isn’t pretty.  I’m torn, because we need to put forth honest stories about us and in order to get those projects developed it takes money and influence.  Actors get that by staring in big budget films, which often are not written by or truly about us.  Davis also mentioned about being offered “ghetto” roles by black script writers.

It’s true that a lot of movies blacks do put out are centered in the ghetto, and this puts forth the mistaken belief that authentic blackness is somehow centered there.  That bothers me greatly.  Primarily because it’s just patently untrue.  Half of all black Americans are middle or working class people who know nothing about the ghetto, including some of those rappers that make their livelihood celebrating it.

I mean, I love comedy and Tyler Perry and ghetto dramas as much as the next person, but there is more to us than that. Where are the movies about our heroes like Frederick Douglas, Thurgood Marshall or Toussaint L’Ouverture?  What about a movie about Maya Angelou or Madame CJ Walker?    Between Oprah, Perry, Spike Lee and every NBA and NFL player there is the money to develop and green light movie projects.  Not just about us, but other people of color too.

Lots of Hollywood movies are stale and whitewashed.  Sorry, but it’s true.  An injection of color would be fantastic to showcase the talents of black, native, Asian and Hispanic people.  I think our stories deserve to be told and our points of view seen.  Art is very powerful and can break down barriers.

I think if America was exposed through the art of film to other cultures even within its own borders, it was foster greater understanding and help mitigate prejudices.  Don’t think art has that power?  Think about totalitarian regimes.  There’s a reason why they go after and lock up artists.

To Many Employers Introvert is a dirty word

  

This is an excerpt of a recent article I found (OK, it came from Google Search) about how introvert is thought of as a dirty word when it comes to employment and hiring.  Fancy That.  The writer is Renee DeCosky, and here’s what she has to say:

“Plenty of people talk about introversion like it’s an unattractive quality and some affliction that can’t be overcome. The truth is that introverts are just fueled differently than extroverts. We’re in our own heads quite often. The quieter we are, the more we’re thinking and generating ideas. It’s not that we don’t know or don’t “get it,” but we’re just considering all avenues. It’s not that we can’t work with clients, but that we like to think about our approach first. And it’s certainly not that we hate being around others and prefer only to work alone. In fact, I find that working as part of a small team can actually boost my “introvert superpowers.”

I agreed with her up until the last part.  I do prefer to work alone, because I’m an intuitive and most people seem to be sensors, I find them extremely frustrating.  But that’s another topic for another day.

Apparently lots of employees think introverts have nothing meaningful to contribute because they’re quiet or that we won’t fit in because we’re quiet.  This is balderdash particularly when it comes to introverts who are not also shy.  As we know, people confuse the two personality types consistently.

As a mixture of both, I have had my share of challenges interviewing for and keeping jobs.  Mostly it’s been my shyness – not seeming comfortable in social situations, passively waiting to be asked questions instead of truly participating in a discussion, and just plain social inexperience of not knowing what to say or how to act at certain points in the exchange.

Some of it has been introversion, needing that time to process before answering and not seeming “enthusiastic” which I’m convinced is another word for seeming extroverted and outgoing.  I mean, is it really necessary to act like a cheerleader on cocaine to be able to do an office job?

What’s so terrible about not being an introvert?  Surely we have something to contribute to the workplace.  Ms. McCosky thinks so.  She offers up these three reasons to hire introverts:

1. Introverts think before they speak.

Every day there’s a story in the media of an employee (typically an extrovert) does or says something to throw their company into a bad light.  Usually on Facebook or Twitter how many careers has that sunk? The truth is introverts are less likely to make off-the-cuff remarks or say things that can be misconstrued because it’s not in our nature. We think through the consequences, and that’s why generally we think before we open our pie holes.

2. Later on, introverts continue to generate ideas.

As people that like to take in information and ruminate on it, it’s only natural that some of an introvert’s best ideas come after the meeting or brainstorming session.  I’m thankful that my current boss is attuned to introverts and their strengths and invites me to feel free to e-mail any cool ideas I might come up with later.

3. Strategy is an Introvert thing.

Introverts are head cases, in a good way; as in we’re in our heads a lot, thinking about stuff and how we can approach and do stuff.  Because of this, many of us excel at strategy or can teach ourselves to excel at it.  For employers who need someone to weight pros and cons or play Devil’s Advocate, an introvert would be an excellent hire.  

Ha, not necessarily this introvert.  I rarely make silly mistakes but that’s more out of my natural cautionary nature than anything else. Were that I was one of those brilliant people triangulating and strategizing, maybe I could play a decent game of Chess.

I digress.  The point is, introverts can do as well on a job as an extrovert, and often excel in ways extroverts can’t.  We can also be successful in jobs typically the domain of extroverts, we only need to learn how to recognize and hone our strengths and then sell those strengths.

Recommended Books on Career and Business Success for Innies:

The Introvert’s Guide to Success in Business and Leadership, Lisa Petrilli ( eBook)

Why Should Extroverts Make all the Money? Frederica J. Balzano (Paperback)

The Successful Introvert:How to Enhance Your Job Search and Advance Your Career, Wendy Gelberg (paper back)

Self-Promotion for Introverts®: Get Heard More. Even If You Talk Less, Nancy Ancowitz (eBook)

We Don’t Need to Be Reminded of How Cool Extroverts Are

Do the extroverts feel insecure or what? There’s been a lot of ink lately about how introverts are not anti-social serial killers waiting to happen, but cool, contemplative folks with much to offer society. 

Apparently this doesn’t sit well with the majority, who feel introverts have had enough time in the limelight and need to be reminded of the sheer awesomeness that is being an extrovert.  A lady recently wrote an article in Forbes Magazine highlighting the “not so secret powers of extroverts.”  Powers.  Not strengths or advantages.  Powers.  They’re super heroes now. 

Look, talking to that guy! Not a nerd, he's got game! It's Super E!

It may come as a shock, but everyone is all too familiar with your strengths, extroverts.  If not by you naming them out right, but by you constantly trying to push us introverts to emulate them every waking hour.

We know that you know that we know you have the population of a small country as your best friends, we know that you are amped up and cheerful (in some cases to such an alarming degree we fear you may be snorting or smoking something), and yes we know you get bored easily and like to party and drink until you drop or at least until they kick your rowdy ass out of the bar.  We are also painfully aware of the advantages of possessing the same traits that society most values.  WE KNOW.

We also know of your shameless need to grab and hold on to the spotlight.  As in yeah, introverts are cool, but look at me! Look at me! Look at me!  And I’m sorry, I think you all are cool and I love you to pieces, but seriously?  Nobody is forgetting you exist or how cool you are at existing just because the spotlight is shining on the introverts for a change.  A very welcome change.

All we want is for you guys to sit down, be still, and stop talking long enough to notice that it isn’t all about you. There are other kids in the playpen.  Different kids.  And that’s OK.  It’s really OK.

Once that is truly established (primarily that we, introverts, are OK.  We know you’re A-OK!) you can go back to your life in the spotlight.  We promise.

Truce?

If You're Skeevy and You Know It...part deux - Valentine’s Day Edition

Shaddup!  I know Tuesday was Valentine's Day.  I'm late, so what?  On to the post:

One of the biggest complaints women have about their men is how they perv on other women when they go out. Some men even go to insane lengths to get a glimpse at a woman they feel is hot.

Pervalicious

Ask.Men.com in a totally disreputable move, some might say, decided to hand these fellows even more techniques for their ogling pleasure:

Looking At Other Women When Your Girl's Around

Is this disgusting or a public service?  I think I’ve come around to the latter view.

Men are notoriously unsubtle about staring at a “hot piece” and habitual ogling I’m sure has cost relationship disaccord and possibly innumerous break-ups. It’s the rare man who stops looking at his partner’s behest, typically with the excuse that he is “wired that way” and can’t help it.

“Babe I know I’m a skeeve

But I just can’t get a reprieve

I’ve got these man eyes baby

I was born this way!”

Sorry, Gaga.

Frankly, I’m all for any techniques that can assist a man in looking at the opposite sex in a more stealthy manner.

I fully understand human nature and the urge to look at people, attractive or otherwise, male or female, striking and/or strange. Seeing that so many men up the ante on glances by but gawking, continually looking, or turning their whole body to watch as the other woman strolls away, for the sake of society, something need be done!

Guys if you are so desperate to look, just remember this: you’re sending the wrong message or should I say messages,  none of which are positive.

What are the messages you’re sending? 

• That you are untrustworthy

• That you have no respect for your significant other or her feelings

• That you are disrespectful of your relationship in general

• That you are single and still looking.

Yes, men are visual creatures; you're attached but not dead, blah, blah, blah.  So are we women, and it’s a lot easier for us to get laid than you. So if you want to keep the one you’re with learn how to look without being so obvious.  And believe me, it’s obvious.

When you learn the art and science of scoping ass, everyday will be V-day.  

Happy V-Day! 

¡Feliz Cinco de Mayo! (I know it's February!!!)

What?  It's February.  Shaddup.  I forgot to post this one last year, OK?

Oversized sombreros, margaritas, chips, salsa, and Corona…this is how Americans uniformly celebrates Cinco de Mayo, a holiday of Mexican origin that somehow got morphed into a raucaus, loadee cum frat boy like celebration some jokingly call “drinko de mayo.” So what is the actual holiday all about you may wonder? Well, it’s not as some believe Mexico’s day of Independence from Spain. That’s commemorated on September 16th. Oddly enough, Cinco de Mayo celebrates Mexico’s freedom from France. Yep, France. I know, WTF right? According to an article in Discovery News:

French occupation viciously swept across Mexico after the Mexican-American War of 1846-48. Mexico was left bankrupt following its war with America. By the 1850s, the country was in a state of crisis.

Newly elected President Benito Juarez issued a moratorium on July 17, 1861 that stipulated a hold on all foreign debt payments for the next two years so that Mexico could get out of financial ruin. Payments could resume after the two-year mark, but in the meantime, Mexico was forced to default on debts abroad.

President Benito Juarez

England, Spain and France -- all of which Mexico owed money to -- were furious. According to
History.com, all three sent naval ships to Veracruz to demand reimbursement. British and Spanish forces eventually negotiated with Mexico and withdrew, but France decided to take severe action.

In 1862, French General Charles Latrille de Lorencez was ordered by Napoleon III to march his forces into Veracruz and attack with 6,000 troops and 2,000 French loyalists headed for Puebla de Los Angeles, just east of Mexico City. In response, Juarez gathered up any Mexican loyalists he could find and put together a 4,000-strong force against the French -many farmers armed with hunting rifles and machetes.

For nearly 50 years, the French army had remained undefeated until they clashed with the Mexican army on May 5, 1862 in Puebla. Led by Texas-born General Ignacio Zaragoza, the outnumbered and poorly supplied Mexican army defeated French forces in what became known as the "Batalla de Puebla." (The Battle of Puebla –commemorated as Cinco de Mayo in the US).

General Ignacio Zaragoza

According to UCLA’s Center for the Study of Latino Health and Culture, the Cinco de Mayo holiday was actually invented in California in 1863. In Mexico, it’s barely acknowledged, and only a few states, including Pueblo, even recognize it.

So there you go, the true origins of Cinco de Mayo. Now raise a glass to the proud people of Mexico for routing the French and giving us a great excuse to live la vida loca, gorge on tortilla chips, and drink muchas cervezas! Gracias senores y senoras!

How I do love you, Margarita!

Why Some Black Men Date White Women

All around the internet you find this question: why do black men date white women?  And it’s a ridiculous question really.  Men date women because they find them attractive mentally, physically or spiritually.  For some people, color doesn’t come into play.  They just happened to be attracted to a person of that color, but color wasn’t the driving factor.  But for a select few, color is the deciding factor or the only factor and that’s not healthy.  Take for instance the black men who date white women because they believe black women are being unpleasant harpies. 

"N* you better wipe that grin off yo' face!"

These black men date white women for the same reason so many black men prefer black women with light skin, light eyes, and long silky hair. These men simply perceive that white women are more beautiful, more feminine, and more compliant or agreeable than black women.

This is the truth.

When you think about it, this makes perfect sense. Who are the women most depicted in the media, movies, porno, etc. and put forth as the “hotties?” Asian women?  Rarely. Hispanic or Native American women? Rarely. Black women?  Hardly ever. What you do see is thin blonde, blue-eyed women and occasionally brunettes or redheads with fake attributes on their chest.

It’s the blonde, blue-eyed woman who is put on a pedestal as the standard to follow.  The blonde, blue-eyed woman is the “Bentley of females” as far as the media (and American society) is concerned. This is why you see so many white celebrities going blonde, why the saying blondes have more fun and the preponderance of blonde women in porn.

"Don't hate me because I represent the beauty standard."

If she had her dithers, the average white woman would love to have blonde hair and blue eyes, be skinny with big boobs. This is what the majority of their men want, and it’s what a lot of black men want as well. 

But this post isn't about what white men want.  It’s about why black men prefer white women. Definitely black men aren't as fixated on blonde hair as white men.  Black men are fixated more on long, silky hair and light skin. Look at any hip hop video, black movie or black porn magazines like King. Black men’s preference for straight long hair is why black women wear hair weaves and relax their hair. This is what their men want. If your hair is naturally long and straight and your skin is very bright, AND you have light skin and blue, green, or hazel eyes bonus beauty points for you. Now, take this a bit further.  

Why have the imitation white women when you can have the real deal?

Light, bright and almost... but not quite

The fact is you prefer features and attributes that are fairly foreign to your ethnicity even though 99.9% of your women don’t possess said attributes.  Every day in subtle and not so subtle ways you are told over and over that the attributes you do possess are undesirable even ugly.  Therefore you are undesirable and ugly.  But you can’t admit that, so you speak in terms of “preferences,” and when that fails you blame black women and their nasty attitudes.

This is an excuse.  Black men who don’t want to reveal their true beliefs – that black women are ugly- instead say: “black women have ugly attitudes.” This is because to admit that you think women who have the same physical attributes as you – dark skin, brown eyes, afro-textured hair and full features is a tacit admission that you are ugly too.  To admit as much is to be forced to face up to this unpleasant fact.  Psychologists and sociologists call this sense of unease cognitive dissonance.  It’s easier to say that black girls are horrible people than it is to flat out say you think they are ugly and by extension you really find yourself ugly.